Greetings, Miss MannersOne of the couple with whom my spouse and I are friends is in a band. We went to support this band’s performance at a nearby eatery.
Around 7:30, we arrived before the show began, and we liked the music, singing along to the songs we recognized and cheering loudly. But as it grew later and later, at about 11:30, we grew weary and wanted to leave quickly.
I told my husband that we should leave when the current song ended because we didn’t know how long the show would last.
We got up at the end of the song, waved to our friend on stage, and said our friend’s wife farewell. After the band said that this would be their final song, we decided to go because we were tired and felt like we had already committed to leaving.
The following day, I felt bad and questioned whether we had sinned by not sticking out for the final song. Our pals haven’t brought this up; I’m not sure if we are close enough for them to voice their displeasure.
Was this actually impolite? Do you think I should ask our friends if they were offended or hurt?
PERSONAL READER:For what reason are you seeking trouble? You couldn’t have realized that the band was almost done with their last song, even though sensible friends would have known. You put in your time after four hours. It’s already rather late at 11:30 p.m.
Miss Manners will let you send a brief message expressing your enjoyment of the music and your regret at having to depart before its conclusion, though, if you are adamant about berating yourself. You may also say that you’re excited to hear the final song the next time. However, it should only be suggested if it occurs before midnight.
Greetings, Miss MannersIs it courteous to avoid shaking hands with somebody you don’t know? Every person I came into contact with at the vehicle dealership held out a hand, expecting me to shake it.
I am aware that their only goal was to come off as approachable and transparent. However, I am also aware that this is a fantastic way to spread harmful bacteria and illnesses. I find it disgusting to have to touch other’s hands because many individuals do not wash their hands properly, especially after using the restroom.
Even the custom of shaking hands should be discontinued, according to an infectious disease expert.
PERSONAL READER:Miss Manners agrees with you in general, but she is concerned about the dangers of the social sickness of not wanting to participate in formalities. Miss Manners will permit it if you can deftly execute another gesture, such as a fist bump or, in less formal settings, a wave.
Including Although I’m healthy, I don’t want you to take the chance because it might lessen the pain. A temporary fix could be to discreetly apply hand sanitizer after handshakes and carry it with you if everything else fails.
Miss Manners can be reached by email at [email protected], via her website at www.missmanners.com, or by mail at Miss Manners, Andrews McMeel Syndication, 1130 Walnut St., Kansas City, MO 64106.
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